Funkyuu
by Princess Sapphire
Summary: kikinu the perfect couple? yea right. inukag, mortal enemies who would die before evne considering the other as a possibility. but can all that change when trust becomes betrayal and hate into love in this crazy world we call high school? AU Ch 4 up!
1. Prologue

A/N: okies, this is seriously my first attempt at a humor fic, so if it's bad, don't u dare flame!! LOL!  
  
Ok, also my good, dear friend (whom I may mention I do not know personally or have ever met and we live on different ends of the country) is helping me with this fic! she is my kinda-but-not-really-and-kinda-is-at-the-same- time editor just in case people wanted to know. Lol. Thankies Kagome-Chan!!  
  
Disclaimer: Kagome-Chan and me own nothing at all.  
  
*******THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOT I HAVE EVER WRITTEN!! THE OPINIONS STATED BY KIKYOU IN THIS FIC DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT REFLECT EITHER MINE, NOR KAGOME-CHAN'S OPINIONS!!! NARAKU IS AN EVIL AND UGLY B- STARD!! Thank u for taking time to read this!! ^__~  
  
CHAPTER ONE  
  
~*~*~*KIKYOU'S POV*~*~*~  
  
He sat there, next to the window in the very back corner of the classroom. Yea, he looked like he was paying the utmost attention to Mr. Myoga's lecture on Feudal Cookware or whatever, but I have been watching him long enough to know that he is just faking it. He's really fast asleep, staring straight ahead. Damnit he's sexy. Maybe, just as sexy as my Inuyasha. Hmmmm, now that's something I need to contemplate.  
  
His long wavy black hair was tied in a loose ponytail. His pale skin contrasted sharply against his midnight black hair. But the thing that set him apart from all the other guys at school were his eyes. The bloody crimson color of them gave me tingles down my spine, and that dark blue eye shadow he wears fits perfectly with his deathlike complexion and helped his eyes stand out more. He looked like a living corpse. I sighed loudly and leaned on my hand towards him, what more could a girl ask for?  
  
I sighed again. He seemed so far away from me in the classroom and to make things worse, I don't even know his name!! Wasn't it something like, Nakuku or something? "Miss Shibito? Why are you staring at Mr. Hiretsukan? You have been for the ENTIRE period! He sits next to you for kami's sake! I understand that he catches your fancy but-"  
  
"What's so interesting about Feudal Cookware anyways Mr. Myoga? I mean, how is it important at all??" I interrupted him. No one and I mean no one has anything more important to say than me. Ever. It's already a known fact in school. I am NEVER to be interrupted and I am ALWAYS right. That's only the beginning of the long list of school rules that I have created. Another one being, NEVER touch anything that's MINE.  
  
Mr. Myoga's face turned a dark red and he started shaking. Hmmm, I guess he was well informed about the school rules after all. Hn, he's probably turning red from embarrassment.  
  
"SHIBITO, KIKYOU! YOU HAVE A THREE HOUR DETENTION FOR SATURDAY AND SUNDAY!!" he bellowed, which seemed pretty weird since he was about the size of a seven year old. "And if you were paying attention, much like Mr. Hiretsukan is, then you would know that we are NOT talking about cookware. We are talking about the Feudal Era. I do not have the smallest iota of an inkling as how you connected my class to a cooking class." Hiretsukan Naraku woke up as soon as his name was mentioned and looked over at me. I gave him my flirtiest smile and winked. What can I say? Just because you're on a diet doesn't mean you can't check out the dessert table. So therefore, just because I have a boyfriend, doesn't mean I still can't check out what else there is for me to sample.  
  
Anyways, another weekend detention? That bastard, this is the fifth one I've gotten today! I knew exactly how to get out of them however. "M-Mr. M- Myoga? I-I'm really really sorry!" I wailed, burying my face in my hands. "I-It's just that-that I've been having some p-problems at home! My parents have been fighting a lot lately and I'm afraid that-that they'll get divorced!!" I cried harder. I could almost see him getting that same old piteous look on his face whenever I did this. Geez, you'd think he would learn after the fifteenth time! But, all the better for me, ne?  
  
"Oh my! I-I'm sorry Miss Shibito! I had no idea! You should probably speak with your counselor about this since it bothers you so much. Here, why don't you leave early, hmm? Here's a pass, just go to your counselor. I hope everything works out for your family, dear," he replied sympathetically.  
  
"Oh, thank you so much Mr. Myoga! You are the best teacher in the world!" I beamed. I snatched the pass, folded the small pink paper, and slipped it into my back pocket. I sauntered out the door; I knew Hiretsukan was watching me. I turned around slightly and blew him a kiss, then sashayed out the door.  
  
Hn, Shibito Kikyou is my name. But of course EVERYONE knows that already, I mean, I AM the most popular girl in school. And which guy in their right minds wouldn't wanna be with me? Yup, Inuyasha is one lucky bastard. Well, maybe he's not THAT lucky. If any of you are wondering, then only reason I refuse to sleep with him is because, if ya give a guy what he wants, how are ya gonna keep him interested any longer? And besides, he's cute and all but not my type. But popularity is a biggie and naturally I would LOVE to have his brother but gotta make do with what I have. Only second best. Maybe third now that Hiretsukan is in the picture. And I, Shibito, Kikyou, MUST have the best at ALL times.  
  
Ya know, now that I think of it, Hiretsukan Naraku. That name sounds really familiar. But I would remember if I ever saw a guy as fine as him so it must just be my imagination.  
  
~*~*~*NARAKU'S POV*~*~*~  
  
I was extremely surprised when I found out that Shibito Kikyou didn't recognize me at all. True, today is my first day here, but her memory couldn't be that bad could it?  
  
~*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*~  
  
"Hey! Hiretsukan Naraku! Did you know that your name pwetty much means 'Evil Bastawd fwom Hell'?" came a young girl's taunting voice. It was none other than Shibito Kikyou. That coming from a bitch who's name meant 'eccentric corpse' or was it 'returning corpse'? Anyways, that's worse then mine. That bitch has tormented my life since we were babies. Kindergarten was when it really started.  
  
I was the little nerd boy that no one wanted to be seen with. I was always carrying around my Super Deluxe Ant Farm, complete with the finest sand, a small ant park, and small ant furnishings, even though I used it for burrowing spiders. I wore inch thick yellowish glasses with a three centimeter thick brown frame, the stupid glasses were so big, they covered half my face and I was told many times by teacher to take off my safety goggles.  
  
I will never forget the first day of kindergarten. Kikyou had already made an army of friends by snack time and I was the lone pariah. When I had tried to sit next to her, she snorted disdainfully and told me that if I ever came near her again, that she would pour my spiders down my pants. Sand, park, furnishings, and all.  
  
But if you think I was weird, wait til you hear about her. She was the fat little girl with the menacing glare that made the teacher shrink back in fear! And I don't me chubby. I mean baby killer whale kinda fat! She was over 200 fucking pounds! And she was SIX years old!  
  
She had always made sure that I never had any friends. In kindergarten it was, "Hi everyone! My name is Shibito Kikyou and I am the pwincess of the world. All of you are my slaves. Ok! Now that we have that estabwished, I want you to know that Hiretsukan Naraku is a weido and you are NOT allowed to talk to him. Ok?"  
  
Then in lower and middle school, she had told the entire school that I was gay transsexual AND that I was a hermaphrodite at the same time!  
  
~*~*~*END OF FLASHBACK*~*~*~  
  
Yea, as hard to believe as it is, throughout my mid-teens I was the 98- pound loser at the beach, who wore my glasses swimming. Ok, fine I was at the edge of the water, but I got wet so that counts. But I was the king of the 98-pound losers at the beach!! They all feared me. And I found that fear brought me power.  
  
It wasn't until last year that I began my self-improvement training. Now look at me, I get flirtatious smiles everywhere I go, and I can take on any guy that comes my way.  
  
I heard she was the size of an elephant last year, so she must have gone on one hell of a diet during the summer. Or she might have gotten liposuction. But seriously, what the hell do they do with all that fat?!?  
  
But despite that, I couldn't help notice how beautiful she was. She had all the right curves in all the right places and had a seductive sway to her hips when she walked. Her clothes were really revealing, not that I minded, it only signified that she was a slut, or so I have heard. Rumor has it that she has slept with pretty much every guy in school with the exception of Atama Homo, an idiot I guess with the most unfortunate name, Ashura Sesshoumaru, who seems to believe he's too good for her or something, Hakaisou Miroku, who isn't allowed to be with her without supervision by Inuyasha, and, most ironically, Ashura Inuyasha. Her boyfriend.  
  
Another ironic thing was that, even though she said I was the "gwossest person alwive" when we were little, she seemed very interested in me now. Interesting. I can definitely use that against her.  
  
~*~*~*INUYASHA'S POV*~*~*~  
  
"Good job in discussion today class! And Kagome? Inuyasha? May I speak with you two?" Ms. Kaede asked, walking towards her desk. The two students obliged sulking.  
  
"Yes, Ms. Kaede?" asked Kagome, trying to sound cheerful but it came out a bored and annoyed drawl.  
  
"Now, the two of you are the best debaters in the class, especially when you are paired against each other. Now, I understand that you are both very competitive, but could you keep out the swearing and name calling from now on? There seems to be some kind of misunderstanding between you two and I hope you work it out. Otherwise I'm going to have to send you both to the dean's office and she'll decide the punishment. Oh and before I forget, no more throwing things at each other all right? So far, you have broken three desks, five chairs, and twenty 50-pound textbooks. The costs are adding up and your parents are NOT pleased with all the bills. Ok, you are dismissed," she finished, waving them away.  
  
"IT WAS ALL YOUR FAULT!!" we yelled at the same time as soon as we were in the hall and had closed Ms. Kaede's door tightly.  
  
"What do you mean it was my fault!?!? You were the one who slipped me the note telling me that I look like hell today and that I belong in a zoo!! Why can't you keep your nasty comments to yourself? Geez, no wonder you and Kikyou are a couple! You guys are a match made in hell!" she screamed. Damn, she's got one strong pair of lungs, that's for sure.  
  
"Shit, bitch! My ears are gonna be ringing for a week now!! God, your voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard! Do everyone a favor and become a mute!" I yelled back. "And you have no right talking about my girlfriend like that! Take a look at yourself! The only guy you got interested in you is that stupid Homo guy!" But of course, I couldn't have been more wrong. Everyone, well maybe with the exception of her, knows that half the guys at school have a crush on her. But of course, that quarter of the student body most certainly doesn't include me.  
  
I am, THE Ashura Inuyasha, senior and most popular guy at school, thank you very much. Photos of me can be bought at eight o'clock sharp in the cafeteria. Signed photos are extra charge. Ok, fine so maybe I shared a little of the lime light with Hakaisou Miroku and Ashura Sesshoumaru but they aren't the one dating Shibito Kikyou now are they? Heh.  
  
I have known Higurashi Kagome since we were three years old, yea, and woe to me. I have had to put up with her my entire life simply because we were next-door neighbors and our parents were close friends. She's always been known as the sweet, smart, innocent, naïve, and pretty little princess. Ugh, don't make me hurl.  
  
Naturally, I see through her charade. She's just a stupid bitch. Not worth a second of my time.  
  
But Shibito Kikyou on the other hand, she was a real girl. Not like that bitch Kagome. Kikyou is refined and intelligent, beautiful and kind. What more could a guy ask for? And I don't give a fuck what other people say about her. I trust her, and when she says that she didn't sleep with all the guys at school, I believe her one hundred and ten percent. And those idiots don't know what the heck they're talking about. I mean, how could she possibly be a necrophiliac? Anyways, like I was saying, Kagome is a stupid, ugly bitch. Kikyou is the perfect girlfriend. I'm pretty lucky ya know? Or instead, Kikyou is the lucky one to have me.  
  
But I'll come clean and admit. I love annoying the shit out of Kagome. She'd get all frustrated whenever I'd contradict her points and interrupt her. She'd furrow her eyebrows and get so pissed that I wouldn't be surprised if steam came out of her ears! It's just too much fun to see her turn all red and dash her "sweet and gentle" reputation to shreds. I'm being serious when I say that I had never expected in a million years that she would pick up those two desks and chuck them at me with so much force! I was seriously thrown into the wall!!  
  
"Ha! As if! I could have any guy I wanted and anyways, your girlfriend Kikyou is a slut. She has slept with most of the guys at the school right behind your back!" she stated and stuck out her tongue. I immediately erased any and every obscene idea that had just popped into my head when I saw her tongue. Gah, Miroku's starting to rub off on me. But she's really cute right now. Holy fuckin cow shit, I didn't just think that right? Shit, my brain must be screwed up, either that or it was her. I personally don't think my brain would turn against me, so it must be her.  
  
Damn that bitch, that stupid manipulative bitch. She manipulates people's brains and forces them to be her friend that way. How else? You don't seriously think she's this popular on her own do you?  
  
She spun on her heels and walked away. I watched the smooth way she walked, how she seemed to float and the gentle sway of her hips, so different from Kikyou, who seemed to walk that way just for show and to make guys drool. Kagome just walked like that naturally. Yuck, was I seriously thinking about her again like that?!?! Damn that manipulative bitch.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I decided that I would stop by Kikyou's class and walk her to lunch. Her class ends about twenty to thirty minutes after mine, but I'm loyal. And I love her. Don't I? But that thing Kagome had said about Kikyou kept weighing down my thoughts. Kagome is known for being completely truthful and she doesn't spread rumors. What if, nah can't be.  
  
Then I saw her. She looked very pleased with herself, like a cat that has just captured a big fat rat. But then she turned around and blew some guy a kiss. I wasn't really sure if the guy was Mr. Myoga or that dead looking guy in the corner, but who ever it was, he had better watch his back.  
  
She came out of the classroom, looking overly pleased with herself, but she stopped short when she saw me. "I-Inu!" she gasped, but recovered her calmness immediately. "Why, Inu-sweetie! You came to walk me to lunch? That's so sweet of you! Just like a loyal lil puppy right?" she giggled, trying to act as if nothing had happened.  
  
"Why the hell did you blow that guy a kiss?? I thought I was your boyfriend? And here you are blowing kisses to some fucking stranger??" I demanded.  
  
"But Inu-" she began pleadingly and in a baby voice.  
  
"Don't, I just want to know something," I took a deep breath and prepared for the worse, yet hoped for the best. "Is it true that you slept with most of the guys at this school? There have been pretty vicious rumors. And I have brushed them aside the whole time, but now I'm not too sure," I said through gritted teeth. "and I want the truth."  
  
Her calm and cheerful expression turned dark. "The truth? You don't trust me enough to believe me when I tell you I haven't?"  
  
"I never said that. I just want to know the truth. Did you?" I asked again. She turned away and didn't answer for a few moments. I knew it was over right then and there. And I also knew her well enough to know what was coming. Kikyou always has a way to get what she wants. The door to her class swung open and students poured out of the room without giving us a glance. Yea, this happened a lot.  
  
~*~*~*KIKYOU'S POV*~*~*~  
  
I turned around immediately and grabbed Inuyasha around the waist. I knew exactly what to do with any guy to get what I wanted. I buried my face in his chest and began to sob. "I-I swear it isn't true!! It's all just a lie cuz all the girls are so jealous of me!!" I wailed. I heard him let out a little gasp when I wrapped my arms around him, hugged him to me tightly, and nuzzled my face in his chest. Point for Kikyou, zip for Inuyasha.  
  
That's when I started to hear some sniggering in the background. That was odd, I heard Inuyasha trying to muffle a laugh. Then I noticed that his chest wasn't and muscular as it usually was. I pushed myself away from him. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"  
  
~*~*~*INUYASHA'S POV*~*~*~  
  
This was definitely a Kodak moment. And the whole school was pretty much here. I mean, after all, it was lunchtime and this was the busiest hallway in the school.  
  
It was hilarious, well despite the fact that my ears now WERE ringing. Mr. Myoga had opened the door to his class and climbed up on a chair against the wall of the hallway. His usual post keep an eye on the students and make sure no one sets the school on fire or whatever. I had moved just in time. When she turned around, she had grabbed Mr. Myoga and had been nuzzling him! And she was tracing circles down his back! God, I thought my sides were gonna split open! I bet that gave old Myoga a lil exercise in an area he probably never used! (A/N: geez, I feel bad, im poisoning people's minds!! Uh hehehe, if u don't get it, you're still pure and it's not too late for you to turn back!! Oh but don't forget to review if u do! lol)  
  
And Kikyou's expression, she looked like someone had-had told her that make up was illegal or something! I fell to floor clutching my stomach, where most of the students were, and wiping off a few tears, god I don't think I have EVER laughed this hard. But in the corner of my eye, I noticed that new student stare wide-eyed at Kikyou, then someone else seemed to have caught his attention. She was standing in a corner with her other friend, one hand clutching her stomach, the other hand clutching the wall. Both of them were laughing just as hard as I was. But the one that he was staring at had dark black hair and stormy blue eyes.  
  
Kagome.  
  
I had a feeling that this wasn't good.  
  
~**~**~**~*~*~**~  
  
A/N: well, how was the first chappie? continue it? or discontinue it? review please! I want a thousand!! Lol  
  
Oh yea, and sorry if it was a bit confuzzling. lol 


	2. Chapter Two

A/N: SO INCREDIBLY SORRY FOR THE LATE CHAPPIE!!! you have no idea how much writer's block I hafta deal with!!! ^^;;  
  
ANYWAYZ ^_________________^ I luv u guys!!! All those reviews!!! ^__^ u guys are awesome!! Heehee!! Here's another chappie just for u guys!! ^_~ hmmm, wow, I made inu REALLY cocky, ne? ^_~  
  
Hehe, incase anyone hasnt noticed yet, I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo not a kikyou fan.  
  
Oh also to the ANONYMOUS reviewer: the "new student" was naraku. Gomen for not making that clear.  
  
Disclaimer: sniffles, no, I don't own Inuyasha and the gang. If I did, I'd be rich by now, ne? hehe -_-;;;;;  
  
CHAPTER TWO  
  
~*~*~*INUYASHA'S POV*~*~*~  
  
After a while, everyone settled down. Old Myoga was sent to the emergency room at the local hospital, smiling. How scary is that? Heart attack or just Kikyou's assault, either one or both were the causes. Kikyou is one vicious bitch. Can't believe I never noticed before.  
  
Kikyou herself was taken to the local jail. She has to wait for her parents to bail her out for what she did to the old guy. Heh, that slut, she was trying to seduce the cops in order to get out of it. Pathetic. Those old cops are way too into their donuts to let her get between them.  
  
But it was weird. I guess I should've felt sad or something, instead I felt free. Like Kikyou had been a ball and chain locked to my leg and now I've finally been released. Feh, I felt awesome! Kikyou's in jail and Myoga's gonna be gone for a while. Everything was looking up for me.  
  
"Hey Inuyasha!! Is it true?? Kikyou's gone for good? That's awesome!! I-I mean, I'm so sorry for your loss!" called Miroku, trying to look sad but couldn't help but grin.  
  
"Ha, right, look at my face, does it look like I'm missing that bitch?" I called back, flashing my signature smirk. Oh yea, I can see the girls swooning now.  
  
"That's good, cuz now you can devote all your time chasing after the girl of your dreams!" exclaimed Miroku fervently.  
  
"What the hell are you talking about?" I asked. Seriously, he must be high or something.  
  
"Why, Kagome of course!! You're known each other ever since you were little! It's only natural that you develop feelings for her. And besides, you'll have a real reason to keep all those guys away from Kagome!" Miroku was grinning like an idiot and I am positive that I'm as red as a tomato. Miroku continued in a lower voice, "Don't think I don't know what you 'talk' to the other guys about. Most of them don't have black eyes after talking with you for "  
  
"I-I have no clue what you're talking about. Stop kidding yourself. The only reason you want me to hook up with Kagome is because her best friend happens to be Sango," Shit, Miroku knows more than he lets on. N-not that I'm saying I do chase away guys or anything. Uh, I plead the fifth.  
  
Miroku sighed contentedly, his eyes were glazed and he had a dreamy look plastered on his face. I'm really glad right now that I don't know what's going on inside that head of his. "Yes, the lovely Sango. Besides, I can't let you get a girl and leave me by myself, now could I?" he replied, wiggling his eyebrows. Feh, stupid lech.  
  
~*~*~*KAGOME'S POV*~*~*~  
  
"AHAHAHAHHA!!! Did you SEE the look on Kikyou's face when she realized she was almost snuggling against Myoga?? Oh, I wish I had my camera!! That definitely needs to be the biggest photo in the yearbook!!" Sango laughed, still trying to breathe evenly.  
  
"Yea, that was great! But did you catch Myoga's expression!?!? He looked like he was in heaven!!! I almost died!!! I don't think I've ever laughed that hard!!" I replied. I think I actually snorted. How ladylike, ne?  
  
Sango and I walked into the cafeteria. All the guys stopped eating. They stood up and moved to another table, leaving one table completely guy free for us. Sango and I didn't say a word, we were used to this. I still have no clue why they do this; they seem to be afraid of me. Well, all of them except for a few. At first I had thought Inuyasha that baka had been the cause. But then again, why would he wanna keep guys away from me? It's not like he liked me or anything. Nope, not in a million years. We sat down.  
  
"Soooooo," Sango said, turning to face me. Something was up. Her eyes were slightly narrowed and she had her evil I-know-you-know-I-know look. I could see the horns growing, the tail flickering around, and the evil fork. "Ya know, I don't think Inuyasha could have been any more blunt when he so obviously dumped Kikyou. So Inuyasha's single again."  
  
"Uh..huh." What was she getting at? Oh wait. No. She can't be implying-  
  
"You're single, too." Sango smirked triumphantly.  
  
I could feel my cheeks getting warmer. "N-no!! Don't be silly! Inuyasha and I aren't even friends!!! We're totally opposite each other!! I mean, I'm sweet and friendly and stuff. He's mean and grumpy and hot-" I froze. I did NOT just say that!! Sango gave me a weird look. "Hot-hot-HOTHEADED!! He's hotheaded!! Ya know, major temper?? Eheheheheheh......" Sango would believe me, wouldn't she?  
  
Sango stared at me. Then burst out laughing! "AHAHAHAHAHAH!!! This is such an awesome day!! First Kikyou makes a complete idiot of herself, not that she doesn't typically do that, and now you just admit your love-"  
  
"AAAHHHH!!!" I squealed as I clamped my hands tightly over Sango's mouth. I looked up. Everyone was quiet and staring at us. "Eheheheheheh....she was just gonna say I love, uh, ODEN!!! Yea, that's it!!" Everyone shrugged and returned to what they had been doing before our little, ahem, interruption. "Whew"  
  
"KKKKNNTT BBBRRRFFF!!!"  
  
"Huh?" I looked down. Sango's face was a dark red. She was halfway falling off the chair and she was flailing her arms. "Oh, eheheheheh." I removed my hands and Sango jump up, gasping for breath.  
  
"WERE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!?!??!!?" she demanded, breathing heavily. I was about to answer with my oh-so-innocent pouty face when a certain lech sat down between Sango and me. Thank god for Miroku. Whoa, please tell me I didn't just say that.  
  
"Sango!! Have I told you how gorgeous you look today?" Miroku stated. "Would you bare my child?"  
  
SLAP  
  
Sango stood up and walked to the other side of me as Miroku lay on the floor, a large red handprint apparent on his face. "Oooooooooooooooh!!! Sango!! Is that a blush I see on your 'gorgeous' face?" I asked smirking.  
  
Sango's blush deepened. "I AM NOT BLUSHING!! I'M STILL OUT OF BREATH FROM WHEN YOU TRIED TO KILL ME!!!"  
  
"Uh huh, riiiiight. And Kikyou is an angel from heaven." I said, rolling my eyes. "Itai!!" I yelled when I felt a small slap on back of my head.  
  
"Feh, stupid bitch. The day Kikyou is an angel from heaven is the day I-"  
  
"Confess my love for Higurashi, Kagome!! So I guess Kikyou is a FALLEN angel from heaven!! Right Inuyasha?" Miroku, who miraculously is conscious, finished for Inuyasha.  
  
"NANI!?!?!?" Inuyasha and I jumped up and yelled at the same time. Lucky Inuyasha, I was just about to slap him back. With my 20 pound science book!!  
  
"Awwww, they're so cute together aren't they Sango?" Miroku asked, his eyes twinkling.  
  
"What the hell?!? Miroku you idiot!" Inuyasha yelled as he punched Miroku over and stomped on him.  
  
"Inuyasha, this is pathetic even for you," stated a cold monotone voice from behind. He looked disdainfully at Inuyasha.  
  
"Shut the fuck up Sesshoumaru," Inuyasha growled, getting off of Miroku and for some strange reason, moving over towards me.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: sorry!! I know, REALLY sucky cliffie but that's ok!! ^^;; review please!!! Uh, how bout until it says 25-30??? Pwease?? ::big pouty look:: 


	3. Chapter Three

A/N: WOW!!! holy cow!! I seriously didn't think you guys would do it SO fast!!! ^________^ I know I say this a lot but you peeplies are sooooo awesome!!!! Heehee, if this keeps happening, I dunt think I'll have time to start my new fic!! not that some people mind *coughKagome-Chancough* ^o^;;  
  
Thankies to Kagome-Chan for being my editor!! ^____^ haha *sends you soon- to-be-mentioned-pair-of-boxers* haha, sorry, sugar high right now ^o^;;  
  
******IMPORTANT!!! Okies!! Do you guys think I should have a little sess/kag in here? It'll still be inu/kag!!! Haha, speaking of sess, can u picture him having neon purple hair with half his hair in a mohawk wearing big black sunglasses dressed as a biker punk???? ^o^;; hehehehe....itz the sugar talking peeps.......^o^;;  
  
Disclaimer: I DONT OWN INUYASHA!!!! Yeesh rub it in why dont you?  
  
WARNING: Inuyasha is a major potty mouth in this chappie. Kagome isn't too good herself. ^_~  
  
CHAPTER 3  
  
~*~*~*KAGOME'S POV*~*~*~  
  
Sesshoumaru glared at Inuyasha. "What the hell are you doing here anyways? Not like this lunch period doesn't have its fair share of freaks and assholes," Inuyasha said, casting a quick glance at Hojou, who sat happily at his table, waving for no apparent reason with a stupid smile on his face. Sesshoumaru followed his gaze and quirked an eyebrow at Hojou's behavior.  
  
Sesshoumaru cleared his throat. "In response to your question, Inuyasha, Toutousai-sensei, my tutor, retired a few days ago so I had to move back here," Sesshoumaru stated, sounding bored, yet emphasizing 'Inuyasha' like it was a nasty thing.  
  
"Feh, yea right....retired my ass, he probably got sick of you and sent your ass back to this country to torment us all," Inuyasha mumbled so softly that it was barely audible, but Sesshoumaru didn't seem to have trouble hearing it and sent Inuyasha a death glare of his own. I turned to look at Inuyasha and saw pure anger burning in his eyes. Yeesh, he didn't even look at me like that in 8th grade when I passed out that picture of him sleeping with a teddy bear!! Hehe, I could remember taking the picture as if it were yesterday.  
  
~*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*~  
  
"Ouch!" I whispered loudly and pouted. "Oh shit, I broke a nail! Gah, serves me right for letting it grow out so long." With a few more muttered curses and bumps, I had successfully managed to climb into his bedroom from his window relatively unscathed. Lucky for me his dog loved me, more than it liked him at least.  
  
"Ok, now to get down to business." I was perfectly dressed for "business" tonight. I had one a black shirt, black sweatpants, and I even wore a black ski mask for extra precaution. My hair was tied in a loose ponytail. He wouldn't be able to tell me apart from any other girl at school. I pulled open a few curtains in his room to add more light.  
  
When I turned around to face Inuyasha, my breath caught in my throat and my eyes bugged out. Inuyasha's blankets had been thrown off and he was sprawled on his back in his bed, sleeping in only his boxers. (Which, might I add, were gray and had yellow stars.) My cheeks were burning as I shamelessly stared at him. The moonlight shone off his jet-black hair and it was easy to see how well toned his body was.  
  
"Gah, snap out of it Kagome!" I muttered to myself alarmed. "This is INUYASHA you're thinking about!!" I shook my head and returned my gaze to his sleeping face. He looked so relaxed an innocent, the very opposite of the Inuyasha I saw everyday at school, that I almost felt bad for what I was about to do. Almost. I grinned and reached into my bag, pulling out a four-foot-long pink teddy bear with a bow on its head. (A/N: don't say its not possible because I had one when I was little. ^^;;)  
  
I then walked over to the side of his bed and put the teddy bear down on his left arm. His left arm almost immediately wrapped around the teddy bear and his head turned towards it. I stifled the urge to burst out laughing. When I calmed down, I took his right arm and made a fist with it. I held his nose until his mouth opened and stuck the thumb into it.  
  
This was great, but I still needed to get him back for pushing me into the school's pond when I was getting photos taken with some other girls promoting our school play. He totally ruined my beautiful dress and it was a picture for the school newspaper!!! Not to mention making me the laughing stock of the day. Being a good girl had its benefits, but revenge was very sweet.  
  
I took the last item out of my bag: a bottle of whip cream, with the nozzle for easy application to food. (A/N: ^^;; I couldn't help myself here) I shook it up and held it near his chest. Five minutes later he was ready for the camera. He a whip cream afro, goatee, and the best part that I do feel a little teeny tiny twinge of guilt for, whip cream breasts.  
  
Ok, now here was the tricky part: actually taking the picture. For the full effect of my work, I needed to get a full picture of him from an aerial viewpoint. The only way to accomplish that was to actually be above him. I looked around, scanning the room for a chair, no such luck, leaving only one option for me. I had to stand above him on his bed. 'But, I could always stop here! I could just leave now and he'd have a nice lil surprise in the morning!' A little part of me spoke. But most of me told me I already came too far to just give up now and I was still sore about being made a fool of. Kagome Higurashi was not a girl you made a fool of, and Inuyasha needed more proof of that.  
  
I took a deep breath and climbed onto his bed. I yelp as I stepped on. It was a freaking waterbed!! Inuyasha's eyebrows knitted together for a second before he relaxed again. I thanked whoever was watching over me. I took another shaky step and managed to steady myself before I fell over on him. "Whew," I whispered before grabbing the camera hanging around my neck. "Hehe, payback time Inuyasha!" I took aim and pressed the button.  
  
I waited a few more seconds. The familiar 'click' didn't sound, meaning the picture hadn't been taken. "Grrr, what's wrong with you you stupid camera?!" I demanded in a hushed tone as I turned the camera around to see if I had taken the lip off.  
  
CLICK  
  
A bright light flashed along with the long waited for click, momentarily blinding me and causing me to tip backwards, falling off the bed with a loud THUMP. "Oww," I whispered as I rubbed my backside. "Stupid evil camera."  
  
I stood back up on the bed and prepared to try again. I pressed the button when I just realized something. THE FLASH WAS STILL ON!!  
  
CLICK  
  
The flash lit up the room momentarily again and Inuyasha stirred. "Shit," I said and tried to jump off the bed. The one who had been watching over me just minutes ago must have decided to go against me. Inuyasha had moved his leg, hitting my foot with it. Instead of jumping off the bed, I tripped and fell in the worst possible direction for this situation. I would have landed on Inuyasha if it hadn't been for my quick reflexes. I outstretched my arms just in time so one was on each side of Inuyasha our faces almost nose to nose. My sweater obviously had whip cream on them from the, ahem, new "additions" I had made on him, but I could get that off easily. I thanked the traitor who happened to watch over me and let out an audible sigh.  
  
Inuyasha's eyes burst open and stared into my own. "Shit."  
  
"K-Ka-Kago-"  
  
I didn't let him finish. I covered his eyes with one hand and took some whip cream from his hair and covered his face with it and jumped off the bed. I opened the window and climb out onto my ladder. I raced down it. My feet slipped and I fell from the fifth to last rung. "Damnit, what is it with me falling on my butt tonight?!" I muttered angrily. I lifted the latch on the ladder and it came zooming down. I grabbed it and ran.  
  
~*~*~*END OF FLASHBACK*~*~*~  
  
"KAGOME!!" Sango yelled.  
  
"H-huh?? What?" was my intelligent reply.  
  
"You zoned out for a while there. You ok?" she asked.  
  
"I-"  
  
"Why the hell are you blushing so hard?" came Inuyasha's rough voice, cutting me off.  
  
"Inuyasha? Has anyone ever told you you're a pain in the ass?" I snapped at him. "So, uh, how have your first few classes gone so far, Sesshoumaru?" I chirped. Sesshoumaru gave me a strange look but brushed it I off.  
  
"They-" he began but was rudely cut off by none other than the 'pain in the ass'.  
  
"How the fuck do you know this asshole, bitch?"  
  
Grrrrrrr, honestly, what the hell is it with him constantly calling me 'bitch'??? "Inuyasha, you jerk!! I have a name incase you've forgotten again!! It's Kagome!" Here, Inuyasha replied with a muttered "Feh, Kagome's a stupid name, bitch fits you better." I sent him the meanest, evilest glare I could, but of course, being me, how evil could it be right? Hehe. "I'm showing him around the school this week. How do you know him?"  
  
"Why do you wanna know? Not like it matters." Inuyasha huffed as he turned away. "Are-"  
  
"Hello, Kagome is it?" came a calm voice, that sent chills up Kagome's spine.  
  
~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~*~~~~  
  
A/N: chappie 3 of Funkyuu!!! ^________^ how was it?? I was actually pretty proud of myself, somethings were a little weird and I didn't really think the whip cream idea was all that great but I needed more stuff and I don't care how stupid you might think I am cuz I liked it. ^_____^ review please? And I'll send you all cyber cookies!! ^____^ review my little chickadees, review!! ^o^;; don't ask, too much sugar is bad for my mental health. ^o^;; 


	4. Chapter Four

A/N: whoopee!! Reviews!! ^___^ luv u all!!! ^^;;  
  
Ahem, hehe, anyways, I guess you could all tell that the first few chappie pretty much just showed a lil personality from the characters, yea some are probably OOC but, hey, this is ONLY a fanfic!!! Hehe, I try. ^_______~  
  
Ookies now im gonna try to get the plot moving along (either this chappie or the next!) ^___^;; wish me luck!!  
  
Disclaimer: I dunt own Inuyasha, rumiko takahashi does. And I am NOT responsible for the damaged pocky.  
  
CHAPTER 4  
  
"Hello, Kagome is it?" came a calm voice that sent chills up Kagome's spine. Inuyasha turned around to face the newcomer as he opened the box of Pocky he fished out of his backpack.  
  
Kagome turned around slowly, not too eager to meet the owner of the voice. He stood there, standing proudly; completely unaware of the stares he was collecting. (A/N: start making your bets peeps!!)  
  
"H-hi, um, Hojou is it?" (A/N: bet you peeps thought I'd be naraku, ne? ^_~) Kagome asked. She didn't know why but whenever she spoke with him, she felt like she was talking to a three year old. -_-;;  
  
"My GOD, that damn idiot! And after all those warnings I gave him, too!" Inuyasha muttered angrily under his breath. A heated gaze focused on Hojou.  
  
"Hmmm, did you say something Inuyasha?" asked Miroku, smirking.  
  
Inuyasha snapped back from his 'daydream' of ripping Hojou apart, limb by limb, giving him a slow, painful death. "W-what?? I didn't say anything!" he exclaimed, trying to look innocent. He would have pulled it off too, if it hadn't been for the twitching eyebrow, the crushed sticks of Pocky in his hands, and the fact that he wasn't even looking at Miroku, but at Kagome instead.  
  
"Hey! You remembered my name this time!" Hojou beamed. "But anyways, I was going to ask you if you wanted to go see a movie with me tonight, Kagome."  
  
"Uh, I, um. You see, I-"  
  
"Oh, I understand. You haven't completely gotten over your case of polio have you? So strong, willing to come to school even though you're suffering. I bet you would go out with me too, huh? Don't worry though! I wouldn't want to put you in any pain! So just stay home and rest ok? I'll even drop by and bring some soup!" he said happily as he turned and left.  
  
"Polio?" Miroku asked, quirking his eyebrow.  
  
"Well, I HAD to tell him SOMETHING! I was running low on diseases! Seriously, I bet you wouldn't go out with him either!" Kagome defended.  
  
Miroku narrowed his eyes, obviously annoyed by the question, and cleared his throat. "I wouldn't go out with him in the first place. I'M A GUY REMEMBER?" he said, shouting the last part. "However, I would VERY willingly go out with dear, lovely Sango!" he continued, grabbing her hand with his as his other hand reached for a grope.  
  
"MIROKU YOU FUCKING PERVERT KEEP YOUR DAMN HANDS TO YOURSELF!" a loud slap resounded in the now silent cafeteria. Students shrugged and lunch continued.  
  
"Hey, where are you going Inuyasha?" asked Miroku, getting up off the floor.  
  
"To handle some business with a particular Hobo," he growled.  
  
"I think we should go to our next class Kagome," Sesshoumaru said, having seen enough of the daily life of a Midoriko High student.  
  
Kagome laughed nervously and nodded. She grabbed her backpack, turned, and left with Sesshoumaru. "See ya after school, Sango!" Kagome called over her shoulder as she left.  
  
Inuyasha mumbled under his breath again as he stormed out of the cafeteria. The only discernable words being 'bastard', 'bitch', 'Sesshoumaru', 'torture', and 'Hobo'.  
  
"Well, that certainly went well, didn't it lovely Sango?" Sango merely glared at him. Miroku sniffed, feigning hurt. "Well, I see that my feelings aren't reciprocated in this relationship!"  
  
"WHAT RELATIONSHIP?!?"  
  
"So, I shall find another to shower with affection. Hmm, Kagome seems a little lacking there, I shall offer her my services!" he continued in a deep voice, tilting his head up, a foot on the bench and his hand in a fist over his heart.  
  
Sango could only stare in shock and annoyance. She opened and closed her mouth like a fish.  
  
"Aha!! I knew you felt the same way about me!" Miroku exclaimed, scooping her up in a bear hug. As usual, his hand started creeping lower, but that was brought to a quick stop by Sango kneeing him somewhere sensitive.  
  
"Damn pervert. You better hope there isn't a next time!" she muttered angrily as she too stormed out of the cafeteria.  
  
Miroku looked up from his crouched position on the ground. When he was sure she was gone, he smiled. "Whew, good thing I wear protection, otherwise that would have turned castrated me!!" he said happily to himself. "Hmm, now, to get Sango to go to the homecoming dance with me!" Miroku strolled out of the cafeteria, his face was pensive as he groped a nearby girl as he left.  
  
SMACK  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N: ^^;; yea yea, weak ending, I dunno where I was going really with this chappie, ookies, but I hope you liked it anyways!!! *hands out chocolate cake* TOMORROW IS MY B-DAY!!! (sept. 30) REVIEW PLEASE!!! ^________^ thankooos!!! 


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